Landbaron -- [adjective]: Fetish oriented 'How will you be defined in the sexual dictionary?' at QuizUniverse.com |
One of my greatest fears in life, if not the greatest fear is chronic hickups. Whenever I get hickups I'm also terribly nervous until it goes away. When I can't cure it using my standard methods I'm beginning to panic. The ancient Greeks recommended tickling to cure hickups. Someone told me when I was younger that tickling can actually cause hickups, so now I don't know what to believe. My mother, that endless source of wisdom, has a trick that consists of pressing a certain point between thumb and indexfinger. That cures hickups. I know how to do it aswell. I cured my friend's hickups once and she got scared and thought I had magical powers. I told her I did and made her my slave for the remainder of the year. And then I started giggling and gave myself away.
I'm one of those people (if there are in fact more people like this) who will always have an excuse for everything. That's because I make them up in advance. There's nothing in the world I've not already invented an excuse for. I made a new one up today, which I was planning to use had I been questioned about my slightly irrational behaviour on my way back from the supermarket. I think I've hit a new low with this one. I was going to say that I suffer from Aspberger's syndrome which causes me to obsessively adhere to the rule about driving on the right side of the road. To the extent that I can't even write something to the left of something else. And yes, I'm aware of how offensive I'm being, but it was a spur-of-the-moment-and-whilst-in-panic excuse I made up.
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